Today is a big day in this podcast, because this is the very first one ever! For those who are new to the Kindness Tribe, our tribe is all about seeking helpful ways to heal our minds and manage the big emotions. We’re a safe place for those who experience the big emotions to come together and be ourselves and take life one step at a time.
If you haven’t seen the Disney movie Encanto yet, what I’m about to share might be a spoiler… but I’ll try to not share too much. 🙂
There is so much to unpack in the movie that it would be impossible to touch upon everything in this one podcast. What stood out the most to me relates to my current focus of therapy right now in learning Internal Family Systems.
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PodCast Transcript
Hello and welcome to Be Kind Minds podcast. Be Kind Minds, for those who are new to the Kindness Tribe, our tribe is all about seeking helpful ways to heal our minds and manage the big emotions. We're a safe place for those who experience the big emotions to come together and be ourselves and take life one step at a time.
Today is a big day in this podcast, because this is the very first episode ever! So, congratulations on being a part of a very special occassion for Be Kind Minds!
I've been wanting to do a podcast for some time, and after watching the popular movie that's trending right now from Disney called Encanto last night, all the feels (and there were a lot of feelings when I watched that movie), they all carried over to today and I said to my husband, "I'm just going to do it, I'm doing it. The hardest part is just starting, the rest is just gathering feedback when things don't go right, and keep momentum moving forward, even if it's slow.
If you haven't seen the movie yet, what I'm about to share might be a spoiler... but I'll try to not share too much.
The movie follows the main character Mirabel, who loves her family so much! She cares so deeply about each member of her family, but struggles indwardly with her emotions and the very obvious part of her that separates her from the rest of the family, is that on her special birthday she wasn't given a spiritual gift (she wasn't given a door)... at least that's what it appeared to be to her family and everyone in the community. Everyone brought it up, all the time. That was really hard for her.
There is so much to unpack in this movie that it would be impossible to touch upon everything in this one podcast, but I'll share with you the big impressions that I came away with.
If you have any thoughts of what meant the most to you in this movie, please share in a comment on Facebook, TikTok or Instagram where I share this podcast.
What stood out the most to me relates to my current focus of therapy right now in learning Internal Family Systems. That was my frame of mind as I found connections to how Internal Family Systems therapy works where there are 'parts' in our minds that work together to make the whole system function in a healthy and regulated way.
Mirabel was an outcast in her family system (an 'exile') in respects to not having a gift and her Abuela having a deep need for everything to run smoothly, no mistakes, must avoid danger at all costs and a great need to reassure everyone that everything will be OK. "Think positive everybody!"
So when Mirabel tries to help, to her Abuela it's disrupting the control that she felt she needed to have in keeping everything the same as it has always worked in her view ("Don't rock the boat Mirabel! Just go away... but I love you.").
When Mirabel uses empathy to connect with her family, each member, her extension of genuine love actually uncovers the needs of each 'part' that have been suppressed by the pressure to keep up to their Abuela's standards. Everyone has good intentions, just as the parts of our mind, they all have good intentions (to protect, to keep the peace, "no pain!"), but when we neglect our needs, when we lie to ourselves and others in order to conform to someone elses comfort and "follow the script" handed to us, that's when things start to break down.
We saw Mirabel exiled for not conforming to Abuela's commands because she felt an urgent call to step outside the collective norm, and we also uncovered why "nobody talks about Bruno" the other outcast ('exile') for breaking the norm and appearing a threat to Abuela's best understanding of keeping the system safe.
It was only when Mirabel & Bruno bravely pushed past what was really really hard for them, very uncomfortable, because they loved their family so much, that we saw that Mirabel's gift was actually her courage and bravery to follow what she best understood to be her calling. A drive, a feeling that she just had to follow. This feeling was overwhelming to her in a good way to her benefit.
In being true to her emotions, in being willing to have the hard conversations and investigate the "why" behind what we saw, heard, and felt in herself and in others, that she helped others find solutions to meet their needs, and helped others have the courage to face and resolve their fears and worries.
Even Abuela, they were able to come to a peaceful resolution in their conflict by having the really hard conversation where Abuela revisited a very sad and tragic memory from her past. In doing so, in having that conversation that was really hard to revisit that part of her mind, that bravery and that courage to do so not only helped Mirabel better understand Abuela's behavior all these years that was really hard to endure, but that healing connection also helped Abuela better understand herself and that her actions (rooting from good intentions) were actually hurting and not producing the results she thought she was getting from keeping such tight hold on everyone. She was able to let everyone know she was so sorry, and allowing everyone to have a voice — be who they are — be who they feel they need to be — it healed the broken home and they rebuilt the home with a new [imperfect] foundation. That gave everyone the space they needed, and allowing that space actually brought everyone closer together than before.
An absolute beautiful movie that I highly recommend you check out if you haven't yet. And if you have, the next time you watch it - see if you notice Mirabel's eyeglasses being green, and Bruno's coat being green. I saw a TikTok where the creator pointed out that Disney created a special shade of green for their amusement parks to hide objects in plain sight. The TikTok creator connected this to Bruno's coat being exactly the same shade. Now that I noticed that, I also noticed that Mirabel's eye glass rims are also the same green. The symbolism that comes to mind, is part of Mirabel's gift being empathy, being able to be so acutely aware of others feelings and needs, that she is able to see things that the rest of the family appears to look past or quickly dismiss. She notices what others refuse to see, and Bruno has visions that he believes no one wants to know about ("Don't tell me that Bruno, that doesn't appeal to how I want reality to be!"). These gifts of theirs are shunned in the existing system because they do not conform to how everyone seems to believe is 'the only way'. But it's only when they all face what is actually happening that they are truly able to heal and thrive as a family.
What do you think the green symoblizes, do you agree?
Please subscribe & follow weekly thoughts on emotional topics, and I thought since many of us neurodivergent minds struggle with calming our active minds, I'd end each episode with some calming music and positive affirmations to feed our mind some much needed love. If you have any ideas or suggestions for future podcasts, or topics you'd like to hear about, let me know! Please follow & subscribe, if you like what you hear, consider leaving a 5 star review, and if you feel able to support an artist, consider leaving a tip via Venmo. Thank you for your support, and please don't forget, Be Kind to your Mind.Please Share This Podcast & Subscribe!
If you found this podcast helpful, and you’d like to support Be Kind Minds, please subscribe to the new podcast channel and share it with your friends! Also, please check out Be Kind Minds on Facebook (join the Group too!), Instagram, and my profile on TikTok. Building a Kindness Tribe is what Be Kind Minds is all about in supporting each other through the really difficult emotions. Together we share ways to manage these big emotions to make life a little easier to take one day at a time. 💚
